Life tales: "He started calling me mama" — A lady narrates the encounter she had with a Fulani herder boy

 A woman hailing from Tiv, who prefers to remain anonymous, recounted an incident involving a young Fulani herder boy. Upon relocating to Abuja, she found that some children would occasionally approach her, inquiring if there were any household chores they could assist with. 

Over time, these visits ceased, except for the persistent presence of the Fulani herder boy, who continued to come to her house and help with domestic tasks. 

To her surprise, the young herder boy referred to her as "mama". Although she harbored doubts, she maintained her composure. However, she couldn't help but feel a sense of unease, considering the historical conflicts between her tribe, the Tiv, and the Fulani.

She said,

"This is a story of how a Fulani Herder boy started calling me "Mama"...

Few months ago I moved into a relatively rural part of Abuja.

Villages in Abuja often slowly transform in to peri-urban areas with the arrival of property owners who start developing the area.

But for a while, villagers and urban migration coexist in the same space, till they are finally pushed out.

This happens like this since Abuja began in the 80s, back then Gbagyi villagers lived in the same area as Civil Servants, even though each category of people live in their own  neighborhood clusters, the villages slowly transform into urban areas.

So back to my story, so after I moved into this village, the kids in the area would come by to ask if we had chores they could do.

Eventually only one boy remained consistent, he looks no older than  six years old.

He would drop by every morning to pick up my garbage in exchange for cash.

I don't know when he started calling me, Mama, it just became a habit for him, but I never noticed, until recently.

Sometimes I would give him bread or left overs, and even when I didn't have garbage he would ask for food or anything I had to offer him.

He would ask me if he could cut the grass near our fence and what ever chore he could invent.

And no matter what a nuisance he is sometimes, I can bring myself to scold him to go away.

I don't know if its the way he calls me "Mama", there is a desperation in his voice that tugs at my heart strings. I am a mother of two boys myself, so a sucker for kids.

Still...

I am Tiv and he is Fulani, and historically his tribe and mine have been killing each other for decades.

His herder families and my farming families have been at war since precolonial times.

But now, and here a child calls out and my maternal instincts can't help but have compassion.

He stops by on his way to his daily herding rounds to ask for favors or small tokens.

I can't help but wonder if he would kill me if a crises would break out between farmers and Herders in this  village where we both stay.

Though very unlikely, I still don't trust him not to take a matchete against me if a war should break out ...yet everyday, he drops by my door step, calls me ,"Mama", and I open the curtains and give him what he needs to throw away for me and a token, and sometimes I buy bread for him.

After I all, I am a "Munchi", to him...and to me, even though he may not know my tribe. I see in him centuries of precolonial threats.

But also a child, that needs a Mama.

Picture  Not Real boy, but really looks like him.

Credit: Facebook|Humans of Abuja